A Journey

The story I am about to tell you is true. It is actually about me. A long journey that I fear has ended tonight. (FYI: This story may seem very overly dramatic to those of you who have never attempted to write a novel before). My journey starts early December of 2011. I was sitting on my bed daydreaming. I was thinking of David's Mighty Men. (2 Samuel) When a thought accured to me what would happen if this was set in a fantasy world. One thought led to another and BAM! I had a story. A few days later I started writing. Yes, this is the novel I had just recently reached the half-way point in. So after 25,000 words I decided to take a small break. I was sitting on bed reading. Out of nowhere a book caught my eye. It was on a lower shelf hidden away. The Vanishing Sculptor by Donita K Paul. After finishing the current book I was reading, (Venom and Song the second Berinfell book as it turns out) I grabbed The Vanishing Sculptor with eagerness. Once I got to the half-way point in the book, I looked to see I the author had a website. She did and does. (donitakpaul.com) I looked on the computer screen. Cool website. It had advice for young authors. Also books written by Donita K Paul. She has written several romances that I skimmed through. I almost left the page but proceed on. At the very bottom of the page was a book entitled A Novel Idea.I clicked on it. I gasped as I read about it on amazon. It is literally a book written by several christian authors for young fiction authors. I read the list of authors: Jerry B Jenkins, Angela Hunt, Francine Rivers, Donita K Paul, and many more! I ordered the book right away. So now you might be wondering where the story turns bad. (It's coming) I continued writing as I eagerly anticipated the books arrival. It arrived. I tore into it with a highlighter. Wow! This is great. Yes, it is a great book. But I soon realized hundreds of flaws in my book! How could this be? I had spent so many hours on this. Secretly, though, I had been feeling like the story lacked meaning. Like God was calling me to write something else. I still didn't want to quit. I had vowed (yes I hate to say it: vowed) to have this novel finished by new years. But after reading not even an eighth of A Novel Idea there were so many flaws. It would have taken a LONG time to fix them all. So tonight I was writing. (Yes, still writing the novel) got to page 115. That is as far as I'll get. I cannot continue writing. I talked to my mom about it and she (hesitantly) agreed. I have already put countless hours down the tubes. But not all for loss. I have learned tons while writing this. So why would I put this long depressing story on here? For accountability. I have been wrestling the last couple days whether to write or not to write. Not to write won out. If I didn't post this here I would be afraid that in the morning I would go back to writing my novel again. I don't in any way mean to nick A Novel Idea around. It is a great book. I think it may  have been a 'God Thing' that I picked up The Vanishing Sculptor and happened to glance at the back cover to the author's website. And happened to go all the way down to the bottom of the page and see A Novel Idea. That is too many coincidences for me. So to Filian, Jakar, Lyaber, Lindle Rachael, and Tyraino (my characters) goodbye. I am sorry it couldn't have worked out better. Perhaps one day I will return to the Kingdom of Anamar to rewrite your adventures, but not today. To my blog readers thank you for reading this long post about my woes. I will give updates soon to what exactly I will be writing. It will be the start of a new journey. Hopefully one as unforgettable as the last. Signing off
                   -CP